A brief summary:

Got on plane, had to sit between Ivan & Dan
Ivan took sleeping pill before dinner and ate plastic around cheese, messed all over the place, ate my and Dan's dinners as well.
Arrived
Fought off 10 people trying to carry my 1 bag
Went to a party at Spanish embassy
Dan and Ivan started work
Dan got Alcohol poisoning, Ivan had to carry him home
I got stared at
I got sick (Delhi Belly)
Made good friends with the bathroom floor.
Ivan got sick (Delhi Belly)
Moved out of hotel and into apartment - loved apartment, has roof terrace and secret store room behind cupboard
I got stared at
Argued with Auto Rickshaw driver about equivalent of R4
Got bored at home with nothing to do, started looking for job
My parents and Jac arrived, went to awesome awesome places, saw beautiful things like Taj Mahal, Red Fort, Lake Palace, rode elephants, watched elephant polo match, saw more palaces, saw lots and lots of temples, loved having family around, went to Jane Temple, thought we were going to die on the way.
Argued with Auto Rickshaw driver over R2
Decided to try cook, went to market, stepped over live chickens through a river of blood and looked at lambs with genitals still attached. Bought a chicken, had to remove parts of the chicken I never knew they had. Psyched myself up for 30 mins. Made a decent roast chicken. Not sure if I'll ever do it again.
Bought amazing linen, Indian ornament things, singing tibetan monk bowls, beautiful bag, crazy loud Indian dress, silk dressing gown, old Bollywood posters.
Marveled at how cheap everything is.
Went to Hindi wedding, should have worn a sari, but don't have one yet - really want one.
Afghan man tried to get me to organise a party for him ??????????
Dan got sick (Delhi Belly)
Temperature reached 32 degrees, started getting worried about my wardrobe.
Started missing home.
Went to stand up comedian - a gay Indian living in New York, dating a Jewish gay American.
Talked about moving apartments (Dust blows into house from roof terrace, dunno what to do with secret room)
Things started hitting the fan, thought about coming home
Instructed to give a man a 'treat' in exchange for his help
Started new job at M&C Saatchi.
It's a 50 minute commute from our apartment.
Waiting for the next weird/ crazy thing to happen to me.